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An Opportunity To Discuss Anita Busch's Sweet Personality

I found a discussion of Anita Busch's personality type, based on a previous profile I wrote and posted of her a few weeks ago, at www.9types.com. I think her personality is similar to mine:

Rich writes: "She seems to be a classic 6W5, what you call, " the tense, cerebal variant " of the Vigilant/Paranoid. She sees plots, keeps changing jobs, ( and leaving people who thought they were friends behind.... ) You notice, that in this long article, fun loving, party times, dependency is not mentioned, which rules out 6W7!"

Jan writes: "Hi Rich Yes, absolutely Vigilant Style and I can see the link with Adventurous Style and Agressive Style too."

According to the Aneagram on www.9types.com, Busch is part of the number six group, the skeptic:

World View: The world is a threatening place. I need to look to authority, but I question it.
Basic Desire: to be secure
Basic Fear: of being abandoned

Healthy loop controlled by Basic Desire: Need to be secure -> loyal -> security -> Need to be secure In the healthy state, the need to be secure induces Type Sixes to be loyal to others, especially the authority. This increases their security among others, which satisfies their need and a balance is reached. In the average state, when Sixes' are not not being so loyal to others, they start to feel insecure among others. This increases the need to be secure, which helps Sixes to again seek out authority and become loyal to it, or become more loyal to others around them. Thus the balancing loop can help Sixes to recover.

Unhealthy loop controlled by Basic Fear: Fear of being abandoned -> distrust others -> security -> Fear of being abandoned In the unhealthy state, the basic fear of being abandoned can cause Type Sixes to become suspicious of others and start to distrust others. This reduces their sense of security, which further increases Sixes' basic fear. The cycle continues to build up.

Insight: We can see from the diagram that a way to help break the control of the basic fear is to weaken the unhealthy loop. Sixes can refrain from distrusting others, and begin to be more loyal to others. This will make them feel more secure, thus reduce their fear of being abandoned.

Premiere Magazine Spirals Down

From Weekly Variety: Under the guidance of recently appointed editor in chief Peter Herbst, Premiere will go back to its roots as a mag for film buffs. "We're a magazine that cares about the process," says Herbst, who helped found the magazine in 1987. "For years we've been an enthusiast magazine -- we're passionate about movies."

Last week, Hachette prexy and CEO Jack Kliger announced that in February the frequency of the unprofitable monthly would drop to 10 issues and the rate base would be sliced from 600,000 to 500,000 copies.

XXX tells LF.net: Peter Herbster doesn't like investigative pieces. At New York magazine, he loved to suck up to celebrities. He's sucking up again with Premiere, a formerly robust publication.

Luke's Watergate - The Steven Seagal/WB Story

Deep Throat says: This is your Watergate. You've got to stay on this thing. Just keep pumping it out. I've never checked out a blog until I checked out lukeford.net. I've never watched a soap opera but this is a better than a soap opera. You never know when you log on what is going to be there. It might be some weird rant or some news that might be true.

The Seagal - Warner Brothers story is a weird one that has many tributaries.

If you die reporting on this, the blog will live on. It's self generating. Even if you're dead, people can keep posting stuff about the legendary Luke Ford. When we do the movie, Russell Crowe will play you. But you've got to get yourself killed.

XXX says: Anita Busch is a nice lady. You'd like her if you met her. She understands how this works. She just wants stuff that makes her look good. Alex Ben Block is a good guy.

Frank says: I don't think Alexander Proctor, the guy who threatened Anita Busch and busted her windshield, is talking much to his public defender. I think he's waiting for some other folks to step in and save his ass but he doesn't have the money to pay them. Why is Proctor on a no-bail hold for taking a hammer to a windshield? A murderer could walk out. Why is Proctor denied bail? What can he do to fight that?

Sore Throat writes Luke: That's the ticket. You're pushing the envelope with this Seagal stuff, breaking the sound barrier. Going out there where the demon lives.

It's like the movie where they ask the guy at the barbeque in the Astrodome: "Who's the best blogger that you ever saw?"

"You're looking at him...Well, there was one guy, his picture is on the wall at a place that really...doesn't exist anymore."

Cut to Luke Ford in the desert. His laptop under his arm. Walking like Brando into the sun. Only why is he buck naked?

Que the end credits.

Journalist John Connolly writes 11/6/02: Luke Ford, I was unaware of your website until this afternoon. Someone directed me to the Anita Busch articles. I'm quite impressed by your work. Very well researched and documented. Continued success. I also agree with your suggestion that the threats to Busch and Zeman originated in the [Steven] Seagal camp. I can assure you that Anita Busch was not the first reporter/journalist to ever be threatened by the "Seagal camp". My sources tell me to expect more arrests and that one of them, not an actor, will be someone very well, known in Hollywood. Stay tuned.

Luke asks: Weren't you threatened with death by the Seagal camp?

John replies 11/7/02: The only threat I received during the Spy story was from Seagal's legal Doberman, Marty Singer. When I refused to stop researching the story, they sued me to attempt to stop publication. They alleged that I had slandered Seagal by asking questions about him. A few months after they filed the suit, they were disabused of that notion and withdrew the suit. Neither Spy, nor myself made any corrections, retractions or settlement to Seagal.

The threat you mentioned happened six years ago. I had been hired by Time magazine to help Richard Zoglin write a feature on Seagal. Just prior to publication, Norman Pearlstein at the urging of Semel and Daly of Warner Bros. spiked the story. I took it to Penthouse and contemporaneous with the publication of the story I received a threat from the "Seagal Camp". Penthouse, my lawyer and myself took it very, very seriously. Without going into detail, the very same people that Seagal recently testified against were the fine folks involved in the very real threat to my life. I would think that the people involved in the threats against Busch and Zeman, might want to think about running to the authorities with their story before someone else gets there first.

Come On Aussie, Come On

Look up baggygreen.com and listen to the Poms get it in the neck! Australia beat England in the first cricket test in Brisbane and is on its way to another Ashes triumph.

Orthodox rabbi cancels his book tour with a Reform rabbi

Gary Rosenblatt writes: "One People, Two Worlds" (Schocken Books, $26) the title of the current book by a Reform rabbi and an Orthodox rabbi exploring the issues that divide them, proved to be all too accurate this month when the Orthodox author, Yosef Reinman — under pressure from religious leaders in his Charedi community — canceled a 17-day, 17-city book tour that was to begin Sunday with co-author Ammiel Hirsch.

The news is more disappointing than surprising, given the intense resistance in the Charedi world to any hint of legitimizing Reform ideology. It also speaks to the level of fear of ostracism within the Charedi community, where rabbinic hierarchy is strong and widely revered.

Sadly, this is but the latest case of a prominent Orthodox rabbi bending to pressure from the religious right. Just last month, a book by the chief rabbi of Great Britain, Jonathan Sacks, was labeled as heresy by several Orthodox rabbis in Manchester because it espouses the belief that Judaism does not hold the only religious truth. One of the offending passages in "The Dignity of Difference" states that "no one creed has a monopoly on spiritual truth."

Indeed, the book, which consists of an 18-month e-mail correspondence between the two men on a range of religious issues — from the authenticity of the Torah to the role of women — offers a refreshingly candid look not only at differing ideologies but the personalities of the authors, who gradually move from suspicion of each other to friendship.

Luke says: Orthodox Judaism by its very nature is exclusivist. If you read the Hebrew Bible, you will see that non-Jews are generally portrayed in a negative light. They are to be avoided. Orthodox Judaism is inherently inward directed. It does not seek dialogue with the world or with heretical streams of Jewish thought. Orthodox Jews and Reform Jews have almost nothing in common. Orthodox Jews have more in common with evangelical Christians than with non-Orthodox Jews.

I read the book. Some parts were interesting, most of it was dull, and none of it was new to anyone well-read in Jewish polemics. I didn't perceive any movement by the authors and I don't see any chance they will become friends. The funniest statement in the Talmud is that Torah scholars increase peace in the world.

Ari Goldman, former religion correspondent for the New York Times, writes: A few weeks before the rabbinic group’s intervention, I heard the two men speak at a board meeting of the Jewish Book Council, the Manhattan-based organization that in all goodwill arranged the ill-fated joint book tour. Rabbi Reinman wore a black caftan, a big black yarmulke and wire-rimmed glasses. Rabbi Hirsch sat next to him in shirtsleeves and without a yarmulke.

The pair seemed very much at ease with one another and spoke with almost giddy satisfaction at pulling off the book project. They called each other “Yosef” and “Ammi” and seemed eager to take their show on the road.

From the Jewishpress.com, an Orthodox Jewish paper:

The Declaration issued last week by the Moetzet Gedolai HaTorah of Agudath Israel of America denouncing "One People, Two Worlds," co-authored by Rabbi Yosef Reinman and Reform Leader Ammiel Hirsch, finally confirms that the book is inconsistent with the long-established Torah view of Orthodox/Reform dialogue on religious matters. Indeed, since the advent of Reform, such transcendent Torah luminaries as the Chasam Sofer, Rav Shamshon Raphael Hirsch, Rav Aharon Kotler, Rav Moshe Feinstein and Rav Yosef Dov HaLevi Soloveichik have not only declined to themselves engage in such public discourse, but have unequivocally proclaimed its inappropriateness. Public dialogue ineluctably sends the message, accurately or inaccurately, that each side has an open mind and is open to persuasion. Surely Reform`s negation of the Torah as Divinely inspired and the very notion of mitzvot, to say nothing of its embrace of such abominations as intermarriage, homosexuality and same-sex unions, makes the time-honored ban even more understandable.

We also welcome the Declaration`s pointed dismissal of the idea that such interaction may be justified in the interests of kiruv. We have long been troubled by the annual so-called "Shabbat Across America," founded by Orthodox Rabbis on the left of Modern Orthodoxy, which coordinates scripted programs on an equal basis in Orthodox synagogues and non-Orthodox congregations throughout the United States. The avowed purpose is to underscore the marking of the Shabbat as a unifying force. Yet, is the non-Orthodox conception of the Shabbat equally as acceptable as that of the Orthodox? Are not the non-Orthodox really being reenforced in their current beliefs? Thus, it is significant that the Moetzet has seized the unfortunate appearance of "One People, Two Worlds" as an opportunity to formally declare that we do not water down Judaism in order to attract people to it.

Jewish Journal Adds Non-Jewish Singles Columnist

I was reading through the Jewish Journal on Sabbath, believing that it would be free of shicksa temptation. And then, on page 56, was the beautiful Moxie (writing under the name Madison Slade) of www.moxie.nu.

Even Fred Nek Votes Republican

Lukeford.net Advisory Committee member Fred Nek writes: I voted Republican for the most part. I voted for Bill Simon. I'm still seething about the incompetent way Grey Davis handled the power outages. It says something that even with a weak opponent and zillions of dollars, Davis could only win by a hair.

I am inclined to stick with W regarding going after Saddam Hussein, and I think the Democrats would fight him on that. Also, I'm amazed that the Dems would dick around with George W on the issue about whether airport security should be unionized. What a pack of clowns.

I approve of George W's nixing the international criminal court. The idea of having a bunch of leftists and Euro-weenies trying to put American military personnel on trial for war crimes turns my stomach. These pansies have completely done away with their own militaries, and rely entirely on our good graces for defense of Western civilization. They live in a cocoon, and never take responsibility for these things. I can't imagine having the "international community" (tyrannical regimes such as in Sudan or Libya; leftist weenies like Norway and Sweden) being put in a position to judge the U.S. Clinton signed on to this turkey. Thank God for W for dumping this treaty.

Also, I generally enjoy sticking it to the Euro-weenies, so I'm glad he nixed the Kyoto Protocol as well. (I must admit, I derive a certain amount of pleasure when the U.S. does something to piss off the Euro-weenies. Go George!)

I'd Like To Apologize To Anita Busch

The rain pouring down outside my hovel, flooding my collection of magazines and Judaica, does not begin to approach the tears streaming off my face as I contemplate what I've become - "the infomation age equivalent of a garbage heap."

Is this Torah? Is it good journalism? Does it make G-d look good in front of the Gentiles?

The onrushing Sabbath forces me to reexamine my priorities for my life and for this web site.

Dear reader, you better read my Anita Busch profile quickly. As it contains so much inaccurate and libelous information, I may be forced soon to severely edit it.

As I lay under my blankets on the floor of the hovel, cursing the rising tide that may soon carry me away, I reflected on the moral imperative in Leviticus 19:16: "Thou shalt not go up and down as a talebearer among thy people: neither shalt thou stand aside when mischief befalls thy neighbour.”

I must no longer traffic in human misery. Instead of soliciting gossip, I will ask my readers to submit original essays of general interest in praise of Anita Busch.

Chaim Amalek writes: "Your decision to stop trafficking in the human misery that is inevitably associated with cinema is to be commended. You will sleep better at nights. But let's face it - many of your fans want dirt on stars, no matter how much suffering that causes. And as for you, well, you want to eat, but you also want to live as an ethical Jew according to Jewish law, which prohibits turning the internet into a back-ho for digging up dirt and dumping it onto others.

"The solution? Why not create a whole cast of synthetic journo stars, with made-up biographies, film experiences, and feuds with others in the field. Sure, it will take a bit of effort to nucleate the field, but in time, these will be just as popular as the real thing. Proof? Consider the Pokemon. They do not exist, yet Americans and Orientals spend vast sums of money on related merchandise. Or consider television shows. Millions of Americans genuinely care about the wholly fictitious characters of the world of sitcoms and dramas. Why should this be any different? I am certain that modern technology and smart writing can be used to create a wholly synthetic world in which the characters are real enough to satisfy the masturbatorial needs of the masses without requiring the presence of real people who have souls that can be harmed."

In the midst of a torrential rain storm Thursday night, I traded email with esteemed journalist Anita Busch. She's a tiger. Oh, why does she think so ill of me? She kept accusing me of making things up. Me, Your Moral Leader. If you don't believe that I am your moral leader, go to www.yourmoralleader.com and you will see it is true.

Ms. Busch sent me a list of seven points where I'd been inaccurate, and at times, malicious. I've examined the list and checked with my sturdy sources. And I realize that I was wrong. Anita Busch was not fired after about a week at Entertainment Weekly. She says she worked at EW for several months. And Anita says she was not fired. So there you go.

How could I have written that Anita Busch was mentally unstable? How could I, the very model of psychosis, accuse anyone of mental instability? And aren't most good journalists mentally unstable? Yes, gentle reader, I've been decidedly unChristian in my reportage on Anita.

And why, oh why, did I tarnish the honorable name of my esteemed leader, Alex Ben Block, the former editor of the Hollywood Reporter, and present executive director of the Los Angeles Press Club?

"He is Editor-in-Chief of Hollywood Star News, Box Office columnist for Bridge News, and since January 2001, Executive Director of the L.A. Press Club. He is an internationally known journalist, author, broadcaster, consultant and show business historian, and for seven years was Editor of The Hollywood Reporter. He is also author of "Outfoxed: The Inside Story of America's Fourth Television Network," and "The Legend of Bruce Lee." He has also been Entertainment Editor of the Miami News, columnist for The Detroit News, City Editor of the L.A. Herald Examiner and Associate Editor of Forbes Magazine. He has won numerous honors, including the Hearst Award, the LA Press Club Award, and four times was nominated for a Publicist Guild of America Press Award." (www.lapressclub.org)

I surfed over to www.lapressclub.com and found it was a tawdry satirical Australian site poking fun at good journalism. I now understand my problem. I am the spawn of convict stock. I come from the land of Rupert Murdoch, the land down under, where women glow and men plunder...

It was while munching on cookies and peanuts at the LA Press Club on the evening 10/23 that I asked Mr. Block about Busch. I did not identify myself as a reporter (which I am not). I did not first show him the calumnies I'd heaped on Busch's pretty blonde head. No, I just made conversation and deviously brought up Busch and her sufferings at the hands of goons and cynical New Times journalists.

It might've been my peanut allergy that caused me to imagine a conversation with Mr. Block that he does not remember. Perhaps Anita is right and I'm just making things up again. Oh wretched journalist that I am...

I thought that Mr. Block said he'd been in daily touch with Anita during her crisis and that Alexander Proctor, the goon who threatened her, was a Gambino associate.

Mr. Alex Ben Block has now set me straight in this memo:

Anita forwarded to me an email in which you quote me, and so I am responding to set the record straight.

On Oct. 23, I did produce an event at the LA Press Club, where I may have spoken to you. To be honest, I don't remember the conversation as it was a very busy evening for me. At the time, if we did speak, I did not really understand what you were doing, or that you would quote me inaccurately and out of context. I find it particularly odd that you would quote me and then write that you were not sure what I said, apparently because of my "accent." I did not know I had an accent other than that of an American.

In any case, since then I have had an opportunity to read your web site. If I had seen it in advance, I would not have spoken to you at all about anything.

I may well have said to you that I had spoken to Anita, because we are friends, and have been for a number of years, and I am happy to be supportive in any way I can to her. Anita Busch is one of the finest journalists, most honorable people and most loyal friends I have ever known. I have great respect for her integrity and courage, as do many other journalists.

Shortly before Oct. 23, I had been asked by my colleagues on Call Sheet on KPCC-FM to make a brief comment about the arrest of the man who was alleged to have vandalized and terrorized Anita. In readily available news stories which I read, there was a mention that this man was said to be a friend of an organized crime family boss. That might have been what I told you. That information did not come from Anita. She and I never discussed any thing about who he was. I only spokle to her as a friend, trying to be supportive to someone who had been the subject of a terrible and unnerving threat.

Since then I have had occasion to read your web site, and to see the unsubstantiated slurs which you make and repeat against Anita in the most casual manor. When you operate a web site, I believe you have the same obligation as any other publication or broadcaster to make sure what you put out is true to the best of your knowledge. I believe much of what you wrote about Anita is untrue, and it is irresponsible to put it out on the public web. I do not believe you have done proper due diligence in this case, and I have been left with the impression that you just print any "stuff" which comes across your screen. That doesn't make you an editor. It makes you a garbage collector.

Anita is a private individual, not a celebrity, and not a public personality. I don't think you should be writing things beyond the scope of her professional endeavors.

If Anita has helped and inspired journalists in L.A., and I include myself in that group, then it is a good thing, not something to be turned into mean spirited gossip. I am asking you to take down information which is defamatory and inflammatory about Anita, because she is too classy to make the request herself.

I am asking you to do it because you appear to be interested in good journalism, and what you have done brings no honor to you or your fledgling web business.

LUKE CALLOUSLY REPLIES: "The remark that Anita is a private figure struck me as amusing as she had her incident with Proctor planted in the NYDN, and she has always excelled at getting great publicity for herself, ie, her deification at the hands of David Shaw in the LAT four parter on entertainment journalism, and at the hands of bernie weinraub of NYT...creating this myth that Fox stopped advertising in the Hollywood Reporter because she condemned Fight Club."

The Honorable Alex Ben Block, who really is an honorable and decent guy, replies:

Dear Luke, I believe the laundry list in your reply also contains inaccuracies, but I am not going to go through it item by item.

In American law, the definition of who is a public figure is quite clear and Anita, in my opinion, would not qualify.

You may certainly do as you wish, but it seems unfortunate to me if the goal of your enterprise is to be the infomation age equivalent of a garbage heap.


It was then that the long repressed tears began streaming down my face and I realized what a wretched journalist, wretched human being and wretched Jew I am.

Khunrum writes: "Finally someone who understands what Luke's site is all about. Hey, I thought we were picking on Steven Seagal now?"

Chaim writes: "But everyone takes notice of a garbage heap. If your goal in life is to get noticed, then you must get noticed."

Khunrum writes: "Eventually someone in the business will take notice of Luke and he'll get a good job with high pay writing for the National Inquirer."

Helpful writes: "The National Enquirer is far too lofty for Luke. I envision him on staff at the Weekly World News. That's more his level of journalism."

Curious interjects:  "Dear Mr. Ben Block,  I must admit that yes, Luke does work in an extremely sordid and sinful environment, but in his defense, I must point out that he has remained pure, untouched and insulated from the gross depravity and vile temptations that surround him.  Luke continues to be a gentle soul whose commitment to God and truth is absolutely unassailable.  He stands alone in the cesspool of Hollywood as a shining beacon of  both dignity and class.  Luke has proven time and again to be an upstanding entertainment journalist deserving of both industry  accolades and his peers' respect.  Luke.  I salute you."

I've Got Questions About Warner Bros

Why were Warner Brothers and Terry Semel in bed with a Steven Seagal and his producing partner Julius Nasso, an accused Mafia associate, for a decade?

Why was former co-head of Warners, Semel, such good buddies with Seagal and Nasso? Why does Nasso have pictures in his home of himself with Semel? Why did Semel eat out with Nasso?

Why does Terry Semel, now CEO of Yahoo, have the reputation of being someone who will do anything to make a buck?

Why did Warners give the foreign sales rights on many Seagal films to Nasso? Warners has the best foreign sales team in the business.

Foreign sales rights are a great way to launder money.

What is the significance of Steven Seagal's friend Danny Provenzano pleading guilty Wednesday? I hear he's only going to serve one to three years, which means he's talking. If I were Seagal, I'd be nervous.

To get rid of his partnershp with Julius Nasso, Seagal went to Provenzano but Provenzano didn't have the power. Sonny Franzese, a scary guy at 84 years, had the power. Sonny Ciccone, a threat to Seagal on behalf of Nasso, was frightened away by Sonny Franzese. When Franzese was put away in jail, Nasso and Ciccone went back to work against Seagal, according to court documents. They've owned Seagal for 15 years. For 15 years, Seagal, a big star for Terry Semel's Warners, has been in the pocket of the Mafia.

Anthony "Sonny" Ciccone, a Mafia captain who rules the Staten Island waterfront according to court documents, threatened to kill Steven Seagal as part of a multimillion-dollar extortion scheme. (LAT, 6/12/02)

This investigation of Julius Nasso isn't about Nasso and extortion. It's about the infiltration of the mob into big money industries including entertainment.

Why did Warner Brothers go out on a limb for an unknown actor (Seagal) in 1988? The answer is that Terry Semel, former co-head of Warner Bros with Bob Daly, has a close relationship with accused Mafia associate Jules Nasso. On the recent E! channel special on Steven Seagal, in 1988, Seagal said, "I have a personal relationship with Terry Semel." What was that about?

Why, in 1996, did Terry Semel and Bob Daly convince Norman Pearlstine, Time editorial director, to spike a devastating profile of Seagal for Time magazine by reporters John Connolly and Richard Zoglin?

Why Seagal break with Nasso? Because Seagal's career was on the skids. He became heavily involved in this Buddhist stuff. Danny Provenzano was telling Seagal, you don't need this guy Nasso. Come with me. Seagal and Provenzano didn't have the juice until they hooked up with Sonny Franzese, who then went to jail.

I hear that this guy Proctor was not hired directly by Steven Seagal. He was hired by somebody else, a player peripherally in the entertainment industry but widely known, and an associate of Seagal's.

Nasso is not the brightest and not Machiavellian enough to send goons after reporters.

The feds don't want to embarrass their star witness - Steven Seagal. Seagal is against Ciccone and Nasso.

Rob writes: I went directly to the fountainhead of all things Steven Seagal, www.stevenseagal.com, and his message board members are more concerned with their hero's expanding waistline than any of his alleged mob ties. Read and laugh!

Seagal? Isn't that a Jewish name? Luke, you self-loathing anti-semite!

Khunrum writes: Do you think there is a way to launder money through LukeFord.net? Second question: Do you know anyone who has any money to launder?

Rob writes: Ever seen Luke's sleeping bag? Trust me. He does not know the meaning of the word launder.

Marc W. In LA - The Adventures Continues

This is not content stolen from www.W..com. It is content purchased through the three meals I've bought Marc in LA. He writes:

FOR THE BEAUTY OF WINONA: "Could she be the first Jewish girl to ever go to jail?" asks Dawn Olsen. Now wait a sec, have you forgotten about Stephanie, this cutie featured on Meet-An-Inmate.com? An erotic (sic) dancing cosmetologist who digs NASCAR? Plus, she was raising a son while Noni was preoccupied with hanging off Johnny Depp or that Soul Asylum moron. Out in seven years, but that's a maximum.

ELECTION DAY: Mere hours after getting busted for not urinating in public--or whatever compromising position the trigger-happy office building security guard expected to find us in--I went to lunch with Luke Ford at a place called Urth Caffe. The valet demanded Luke not park his battered white van (he doesn't need to affix a sticker that says "no radio"--because it really doesn't have one) directly outside the establishment. As a result I spent many minutes waiting for his return on the sidewalk astride the patio--it wasn't long before a real-life Wendie Malick type stood up from behind her table and seductively shimmied herself toward me, wondering if I was "Bob". Golly, the womenfolk ain't this forthright where I come from; and, at that moment, I immediately realized that no matter how many sardonic Steve Martin-type ruminations I encounter on the vapidity of Los Angeles starlet types, the more alluring the idea of them actually becomes. I mean, if I actually were Bob, who knows what kind of marathon casting couch shenanigans would be transpiring as you read this.

Instead, myself and Luke set ourselves down waiting for Jeffrey Wells, so that we could spend some quality time doing what online Hollywood scribes do. And, in Jeffrey's case, that was sleeping in after a rigorous viewing of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets the night before. Instead, Luke explained how a woman he exchanged pleasantries with in line at the Urth Caffe was one he'd dated before. A similar encounter took place a couple days before, with me in tow, at the classy Kosher pizza joint we patronized. Luke assured me, that with forty such past relationships scattered around L.A., that he anticipates running into at least one more before our adventure is done. Note that he made no effort to introduce me to any of these mysterious females who .... with Internet journalism legend Luke Ford.

Before we were done chowing down, Luke spotted an actual blonde Playboy Playmate of indeterminate origin, but we didn't stick around long enough to figure out who it might've been. This mysterious centerfold notwithstanding, it's quite clear that breast implants have been tossed into the pre-9/11 dustbin. No unsightly silicone sightings during all this patio time. So far.

Since he'd left Mr. Wells's phone number in the van, parked several blocks away, finally meeting our guest of honor became a more complicated process. Luke was finally able to rouse Jeffrey. (You can read LF's biographical sketches of him here.) The three of us retreated to the genuine imitation botanical garden at Elixir. I gained greater perspective, not only on the healing powers of the world's most wondrous tonics, but also the yin/yang relationship between Wells and his maverick counterpart David Poland. Wells said he deliberately antagonized Poland recently by suggesting that the twelve-year-old actress who plays Hermione in the Harry Potter flicks was imminently going to be--how you say?--hot. Hey, I assured Wells, people have been making those comments about the Olsen Twins since even before Emma Watson was born. Wells didn't seem to know who Mary-Kate & Ashley even were. I informed him this is not something to be ashamed of. For whatever it's worth, I was not aware that the scatalogical name "Movie Poop Shoot," home of the incisive scrawlings Jeff offers via Kevin Smith's website, was a reference from Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, which I never got around to seeing. That's why we need these noble men, to keep up with Hollywood, so that chumps like myself don't need to. It's a nice living, with lots of low-maintenance drama and cheap thrills. Please advise me how I can do the same.

From there, I was dropped off by Luke to traverse Hollywood Boulevard and the Walk of Fame, and wondering, fifty years from now, who the heck is going to remember what all these names were famous for? They hold a ceremony to unveil a star and it just sits there--occasionally, seeing a name like "Roscoe Arbuckle" is enough to raise an eyebrow, but hope that any star you want to take a picture of yourself sprawled over isn't anywhere near the Hollywood and Highland complex, a place where some of the finest uniformed personnel in America are keeping the sidewalks free of vermin. There are, contrary to popular belief around here, way more vagrants in Toronto nowadays--but they aren't as professional about it. It's either that, or just more difficult to procure your own shopping cart in Canada.

Well, you're either part of the problem or part of the solution, right? And, thanks to Ann Sailsbury, who gives lady lawyers a better name than they deserve, that Election Day night was spent by myself and Moxele in the thick of the Democrats' post-election bacchanal at the Century Plaza Hotel, which culminated in Gray Davis's victory speech, balloons and confetti falling from the sky, and all the DNC accoutrements. And I only dozed off once. Still processing those experiences from my side. In the meantime, all I can say is, the event was just like being in the movies.

Does Anyone In Luke-Land Have A Real Job?

Khunrum writes: After months of reading about and visiting the sites of Luke's posse Jeffrey Wells, David Poland, Ms. Moxie Nu, Master W. etc. etc. I wonder if anyone in California has a real job? You know what I mean. The kind of employment where one has to be somewhere at a certain hour and actually do something.

My impression is that everyone hangs out at trendy cafe's sipping lattes and reviewing movies. And after experiencing this grand lifestyle is there even a remote possibility that Young W. will return to the frigid environs of Oh! Canada? I think not. Luke, I believe you have a permanent sidekick. A Tonto to your Lone Ranger as it were.

Rob suggests: Probably more akin to a 18 year old Jamican immigrant to your Lone DC Sniper!

Khunrum writes: We haven't heard much from Chaim Amalek lately. A brief sentence here and there. I believe this is because The Amalek is genuinely pissed, and with good reason. When Chaim visits LA he gets lectures on correct Torahistic behavior and little else. No introductions to those world renown legendary California hotties Luke has access to.

On the other hand, Master W. is given the royal treatment. Complimentary dinners on Luke. Introductions to Levi's indolent, employment shy, tinsletown buddies and a personal tour of the homo and drug infested back alleys of Hollywood. What is a New York Jew to think? Blatant favoritism I say.. Chaim, please do not let this crude snub keep you from further contributions to the site. I believe I speak for all when I say, we miss your input.

Chaim writes: The guy rips me off, and when I visit LA, he piously lectures me on the need to adhere to the 613 rabbinical rules of Judaism. This literally right after he goes to.... Meanwhile, others get treated to female companionship. All I get is lectures on how to be a better Jew.

Who Wants To Kiss A Greasy Actor?

Jeffrey Wells writes (and David Poland disagrees): "I'm developing a theory that moviegoers are repulsed when actors (including stars) appear greasy and grimy over the course of a film, especially if one or more is involved in a romantic entanglement. Who wants to kiss a guy who hasn't had a bath in two weeks, or a girl with greenish teeth who wears smelly socks and has dirt under her fingernails?"

Luke says: I agree. All things being equal, I wouldn't want to watch such characters. I doubt that Scorsese's new film Gangs of New York will earn its $120 million investment back (and that number is prior to marketing expenditures).

Variety.com A Day Late

About a day after Matt Drudge reported that the Republicans were taking control of the US Senate, Variety.com headlines its page: "The roller-coaster political ride of the last two years got even hairier for Hollywood Tuesday night as control of the U.S. Senate remained hanging in the balance."

Variety keeps many of its scoops off its website (so the competition like Hollywood Reporter won't get them) until they are published in their print mags. But this leaves their website behind the times.

WB's Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets Is A Tedious Bore

Warner Brothers held a test screening for the new Harry Potter movie, directed by the second-rate Chris Columbus. The critics are embargoed from writing on the movie for ten more days but I hear that, in general, they are not impressed.

I hear the new movie sticks more closely to the J.K. Rowling book than the first one did. I hear the film is a long tedious bore. It runs 161 minutes long.

David Poland hints about the new Potter film on his site Hot Button: "Ironically, the movie from Monday night that I can’t talk about is significantly better than expected and I was shocked to have enjoyed it as much as I did. It had more imperfections than today’s film did. But it also had a lot more magic… so to speak."

Stoned writes on Imdb.com: "As 'Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone' was renamed 'Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone' because Americans are (apparently) too stupid to know what a philosopher is....maybe they should rename this one 'Harry Potter and The Room-Like Area of Things We Shouldn't Tell People'?"

Riding With Luke

Marc W. writes: I do not understand Luke's occasionally subtle digs at my physical condition. I'm sorry I don't have those penal colony genes passed down through the Ford family--I am the product of an Ashkenazi Jewish lineage via Poland settling into the cold great lakes climes. Most guys of that background look like me. The ones who don't are rather short and scrawny instead. But if Luke wants to hang out with people of the book who hail from further up north, he's going to need to get over taunting me with tactics like doing pull-ups on a tree branch (!) and then a cheap shot about how he'd like to see me do the same. You'd think all those visits to the Museum of Tolerance would've taught him a thing or two.

Steven Seagal, wannabe mob guy?

From the New York Post: A lawyer for a reputed mobster accused of extorting actor Steven Seagal claims the action-movie hero may be behind a pair of frightening threats made toward reporters covering the case.

Defense attorney Barry Levin said Seagal is the subject of a criminal investigation in California for allegedly threatening two reporters covering a bitter dispute between the star and his former film producer, Julius Nasso.

Luke says: In my 9/13/02 report, I named Seagal as the likely suspect behind the threats to the two journalists - Anita Busch and Ned Zeman.

Gil Cates Produces Oscars

HOLLYWOOD (Variety) - Gil Cates will produce the 75th annual Academy Awards, which will be held Sunday, March 23, at the Kodak Theatre in Hollywood. The ABC-televised gig will be Cates' 11th as producer of the Oscarcast; last year's event was produced by Laura Ziskin.

On August 6, 2002, I interviewed producer Dennis E. Doty, business partner of director Gil Cates, at their office in Westwood.

Luke: "Where did you grow up?"

Dennis: "In Newhall, now Valencia, an hour north of Los Angeles. When I was growing up, Newhall had 7000 people. It now has about 300,000 people. My father worked for Lockheed on the U-2 and other things.

"I went to William S. Hart High School. My grandfather knew the actor William Hart. I have two sisters and one brother, all younger.

"I went to USC 1959-63. I was going into dentistry. I went to the first indoctrination at USC prior to the school year, and I see that they have a department of telecommunications and cinema. And at that moment, I decided that I didn't want to spend my life looking into other people's mouths. I'm going to do what I love to do - television.

"I would coerce my folks into taking me to television shows. I'd sneak around movie lots and watch people make movies. I told my parents and they accepted it.

"I was a child of live television [in the 1950s and early '60s]. Sid Caesar, The Show of Shows, Producer's Showcase and the great live dramas and variety shows. Gil and his late brother Joe produced some of those shows including The $64,000 Question.

"I was at ABC from 1963-76. I wound up as the last vice-president of what was called variety programming. It's now called reality programing.

"My first low-level job in the industry was as a part-time page at ABC. In the first few months, I learned as much as I did at USC.

"I spent six months full-time in the Air Force Reserves and then spent five years in the Air Guard as a public information officer.

"I always wanted to produce and I moved up the ranks. I became a production manager at age 23 on General Hospital and American Bandstand."

Luke: "Did you know Edgar Scherick?"

Dennis: "When I was a page, Edgar was ABC's head of programming. He was a major executive and a volatile character. New to the job, I was assigned to be the page/gopher at a theater they'd just remade in Hollywood. It was called The Jerry Lewis Theater. Formerly, it was the El Capitan. It became The Hollywood Palace. It is now the Vine Street Theater. It was a legendary theater that they did radio out of in the thirties.

"They were renovating the theater to do this big new Jerry Lewis Live show. It was ABC's big thrust into Saturday night. A two-hour live extravaganza with Jerry Lewis.

"My first vision of Edgar was on opening night. The smell of disaster was in the air. I was told to take something back to Jerry's dressing room. Edgar was behind the spiral staircase in the corner, looking like he had seen the future and it was grim.

"Edgar was a great character. Shortly thereafter, I was assigned to go to the Beverly Hills Hotel. The big potentates from New York were coming out. ABC was short on money then. Leonard Goldenson, the chairman, Tom Moore, the president and the corporate counsel were sharing bungalow seven to have a confab about the season. My job was to sit in the corner, answer the phone, and do gopher work.

"I was terrified. I was on the job only a month. All these legendary people were coming in to town. I was befriended by the VP of West Coast Operations, Vince Francis. They were awaiting the arrival of Edgar Scherick so they could have their first meeting.

"It was like the coming of Mohammed. He was late. I was working the phone. 'He's on his way from the airport.' 'He's not at the front desk yet.'

"Then later, 'Mr. Scherick is at the front desk.' 'Well, is he coming right out?' 'No, he's going to his suite first.' 'Tell him to get out here, we're all waiting.'

"I'm going to tell dynamo Scherick? So I said, 'Mr. Scherick, they're all waiting for you a little anxiously out here.' So he arrives with Douglas Cramer in tow, his assistant out here.

"Edgar came in like a whirling dervish. He took all the air out of the room.

"Edgar and Douglas were on the sofa. All of a sudden, Douglas sneezed. Edgar rips out a handkerchief. 'You have a cold! You have a cold! Get away from me. Sit over there.'

"I thought, 'Oh God, this is going to be exciting.' So I had three days of watching and learning from these guys. And over the years, I wound up a good friend of Edgar.

"In 1968, I joined ABC's programming department on the West Coast after being the head of the unit managers. I knew that programming was better paying, you had bigger expense accounts and a different kind of responsibility and power.

"When the East Coasters came out for meetings, we'd hang out at the Bel Air Hotel. Michael Eisner had replaced Barry Diller as the chief of staff of the programming department, the assistant to program director Marty Starger. Barry engineered himself into V.P. of East Coast development.

"Michael determined that I was the perfect fit to replace him so he could then become the head of daytime programming. One night we were sitting at the Bel Air. Michael said to me, 'I'm going to make your career.' I said, 'You will?' He said, 'Yes. You are going to take my job and I am going to take the daytime job.' I said, 'Gee, that's nice but I don't want to go to New York.'

"After ten weeks of his selling and cleverness, I moved to New York and was there until Starger left. I became the head of early morning programming. ABC didn't have any programming at the time until 10:30AM. I started AM America, which became Good Morning America. So Michael did change my career, as he does for lots of people."

Luke: "Didn't Michael and Barry invent the TV movie?"

Dennis: "The TV movie has many fathers. Barry was the first anointed head of movies for television. It was a de facto experiment that had no head. Now Michael and Barry are sharp. One of Barry's domains when he was vice-president of East Coast programs was acquisition of features. He extended his connections, cleverly, into all the studios as the buyer for feature films.

"When the television movie business looked like it was going to be a business, Barry's connections, plus logic, dictated that it should go under his domain.

"The real parents of TV movies were program directors Leonard Goldberg and Marty Starger. It was then fostered into success by Barry. Michael was mostly doing other things."

Luke: "Why is the producer, particularly the executive producer, king in television?"

Dennis: "Who else is there? Directors don't nurture TV projects along. TV directors say 'action' for a living. It's got to be somebody who finds it, believes in it, ties it up, molds it, sells it, get the second and third writer if necessary, sell it again, rewrite is a long bridge, and then make sure that it gets done for the $1.10 that you have to do it. Cable executives are assuming this role. But at the end of the day, they go on to the next meeting and the next phone call. Somebody has to be sitting watching the stove all the time.

"The show-runner theory of episodic TV. David Kelley is the arch-example of the god emperor of show-runners. Directors come and go on series. One of the battles that the DGA is having now is that TV directors get script changes while they're shooting, which they say prevents them from doing good work, which it does. How can you prepare if you don't know what you're doing? Then if you don't make the requisite number of shots, the producer screams at you. Maybe that's good writing but it is bad producing. It's not good for the enterprise to not let everybody do their best work. Actors and directors need time to do their best work. They don't read TelePrompTers like newsmen."

Luke: "Why did you leave ABC?"

Dennis: "It's a burnout business there. In my last year, I realized that the people I met with were doing what I wanted to do. They would leave the room and go produce the shows. And I would sit here and deal with network stuff. Fred Silverman came in, and, rather than firing me, gave me a great promotion. He made me vice president of East Coast and European programming. Mike Eisner came to the West Coast as head of primetime programming and my boss."

Luke: "What do you mean by European programming?"

Dennis: "Finding European formats. One of the guys who sold to me was Don Taffner. He had the franchise to sell formats from Thames Television in England. You'd sift through their pilots and pick out which ones looked interesting. Fred said to me, 'I want you to be in London once every six weeks. Nose around. Talk to the people. See what's going on.'

"I went to London. I had the obligatory lunch upstairs at Thames. I went down to the screening room and ran these shows. It was about 4PM. I'd looked at three of the four shows from a new series. It was now late enough to call the West Coast. I phoned up Michael. I said, 'I have just looked at three of the four episodes of this thing, Man About the House. We should absolutely buy it. It smells good. It's a menageatois. This guy lives in a house with two girls. It's a little nasty and funny.' He said, 'Don't even watch the fourth episode. Make a deal.'

"So we made a deal and it became Threes Company and it made Don Taffner a quarter of a billion dollars. I worked for him years later.

"Our objective as network executives was not to produce the show, but to buy the right show and give it whatever support or kick in the pants it needed to achieve whatever it was we thought we'd bought. You'd only go in there if there'd been some calamity. I can rarely think of a time when a producer's suggestion was not agreed to.

"We [Cates and Doty as producers] had an experience of an incredible film editor who'd done several movies for us who was not approved by a CBS senior executive. We couldn't figure it out. But no, they had a bad report on her and wouldn't let us use her.

"This editor came from the Ann Coates old style school of editing.

"An executive should only come into an editing room at the request of the filmmakers. She had an experience where an executive bullied his way into the cutting room and bullied the director about some changes he wanted. She said to the executive, 'You really are some fu--ing jerk. This is the worst idea. Where does it come from? I can't listen to it anymore. It's a terrible idea and I am not going to do it.' So the executive determined that the network didn't do business with her anymore.

"She has done four films for us since then.

"As producers we feel that if you don't want to do business with us, don't. But if you do, let us do our business. Don't barge in. Don't be meddlesome or dictatorial."

Luke: "What are the biggest jams you've ever gotten out of?"

Dennis: "I went through three movies in a row where I had to fire the cameraman. One of them was Marlo Thomas doing Consenting Adults. There was a huge personality problem between Marlo and the Academy Award winning cameraman. He had no bedside manner for a star who was concerned about being middle aged. She's a perfectionist. You could smell it coming. You'd put a problem back in the bottle and it would blow up again.

"The cameraman she wanted finished his assignment and we brought him on. Then Marlo, that night, threw the original cameraman a huge party after being responsible for driving him off the movie."

Luke: "Would there ever be an instance where the star would be replaced because the cameraman is too powerful?"

Dennis: "No. Once you have one day on film, everyone knows where the money is.

"Firing hair and makeup people happens. The day starts and can be made or broken [for the stars] in the makeup trailer. When I make my rounds in the morning and jolly everyone up, you can get the drift right off the bat. If stars have a problem, that's where it will come out. It's like a confessional."

Luke: "Do you ever have to replace a star?"

Dennis: "We were shooting the "The Return of Marcus Welby M.D." movie (1984). It was supposed to become a series and the load would be carried by Darren McGavin. He'd become the new Marcus Welby and Robert Young, because he was rich and old, would do a few walkthroughs in each episode.

"Darren McGavin was not easy. A week before shooting, I was in a meeting on another project. I was told that it was urgent that I take the phone call. It was Darren McGavin's agent saying that Darren had withdrawn from the movie. I said, 'What? What do you mean? They're rehearsing. I'm leaving here in ten minutes and I'm going to his house. Tell him not to do anything. I will be there in an hour and we'll talk this thing out.'

"He was being a star. He threw the ultimate glove on the field because he was determined to win this point, a script change. And he did. By the time the sun set, he was back in the movie.

"The new James Brolin character came down with a flu. The next morning he can't work. So we scramble to put a day together. Then another actor comes down with the flu. So we're scrambling to put out fires. The next day, after putting Universal and the insurance on notice, and we have a couple of doctors on set, we're trying to figure out what we can shoot. We got going and I left the set.

"I'm in my office. I get a phone call from the production manager who says, 'You better get up here real fast, Robert is sick.' I go up to the stage in my golf cart. The studio ambulance is there. Robert, who's about 80 years of age, is in his dressing room. I go in there. Robert Young is on a gurney with IVs going into him. He'd now been stricken by a terrible case of the flu and had to go to the hospital.

"We go off to St. Josephs Hospital. I keep thinking, 'I made the movie that killed Robert Young.' We get to the hospital. The press is there. By the end of the day, he's able to walk out and go home. But the doctor won't let him work tomorrow.

"We had eight shutdown days on that film. I had to fire the cameraman. It turned out to be a good film and I became a friend of Robert Young."

Dennis: "TV movies was an opportunity for many of us to tell real stories about people. It's a faster business than features. You either develop and producer or you develop and abandon, but you don't spend your life running around the world with a feature script that will never get done. TV movies was also a business where you could own the copyright.

"It's a harder business today for entrepreneurial producers because you seldom can own your negatives. You become work for hire. Some of the lust to fight for your story becomes diminished because the business has changed.

"At Cates-Doty, we're lucky that half of our business is doing huge television specials, such as ABC's Ford's Theater and the Oscars. We just did a big show for McDonalds and CBS on Memorial Day weekend - we mounted a big entertainment show on the aircraft carrier Harry Truman in Florida."

["Rockin' for the USA: A National Salute to the US Military" was hosted by Cuba Gooding Jr with Celine Dion, Marc Anthony, Clint Black and Jessica Simpson.]

Luke: "That signals a dramatic change to the entertainment industry's approach to the military. We wouldn't have done this a year ago."

Dennis: "Probably not. And there were some forces not so hot about doing it."

Luke: "Which forces?"

Dennis: "I wouldn't even say because some of them cut close to your home, heart and pocketbook. I think 9/11 put a new twist on a lot of stuff and suddenly patriotism, in the form of being respectful and proud of not only firemen and policemen but of the military, is coming back into vogue. I think that's a good thing. I think that pride in country is a healthy symptom.

"As a studio executive, one of the first pictures I oversaw was the first story on the Vietnam War made for television [1979's Friendly Fire based on the book of the same name by C.D.B. Bryan]. The executive producer was Marty Starger.

"The Vietnam War had left a terribly sour taste in people's mouths. It was like, 'Who wanted to see a story about something we didn't want to acknowledge existed?' The respect for the fighting people out of that war was at a bad ebb. It was a horrible place in our memory and people didn't want to go back there.

"This story found a domestic approach into the war without being a war movie. It was a family domestic drama.

Yovivo writes on Imdb.com: "Riveting film about a family torn apart by a death in Viet Nam. The son of a farmer goes to war in an infantry unit and is killed by his own men by accident. The grief suffered by his family was hard to take as I watched the movie. Carol Burnett was brilliant as the shocked and angry mother."

Dennis: "Until that time, television wouldn't touch the Vietnam War. We fought for it. We fought to get Carol Burnett cast in it against ABC's better interests. Then she got all kinds of awards and it began her dramatic career. It was a benchmark Emmy winning, Golden Globe winning movie.

"Then Gil and I did another pioneering movie, Consenting Adults [1985]. It was one of the first stories done about homosexuality in a family. That Certain Summer was the first one several years before with Hal Holbrooke and Martin Sheen."

Texguy writes on Imdb.com: "I saw this movie back in 1985 when it premiered on television. Marlo Thomas plays Tess Lynd a mother whose son announces that he is gay. Tess' husband is not accepting of the son and a battle ensues. Tess is torn between the love of her son and her husband. Marlo Thomas gives a great performance!! I was a bit shocked though, parts of this film are pretty risque for the time and television! I can remember vividly how the viewer almost was part of the sexual activity the son was having, but it was done tastefully."

Dennis: "It was based on Laura Z. Hobson's acclaimed book and how it devastated her family when it didn't have to.

"Escape from Sobibor (1987) is the biggest picture I've ever done, about the only successful uprising and overthrow of a concentration camp in WWII. That picture was developed at ABC. We went with their writer of choice. It was a year in development and this guy couldn't get a script together. He got too far into the people in the story that he couldn't find the drama.

"We regrouped. We got Reginald Rose, Academy Award-winning writer, and started all over again at CBS. The total development lasted four years. It was a three-hour powerful drama with a cast of thousands. It was a hugely expensive production that we had to sell off to Chrysler to get it made."

From reviews on Imdb.com: "The film deals with some weighty issues which prisoners in Auschwitz also grappled with: 1. what sort of moral compromises did the prisoners have to make to stay alive in Sobiblor 2. where was God when this was going on 3. differences among Jews (eg. the differences between the Dutch, Polish and Soviet Jews in Sobibor)."

"This is one of the most terrifying accounts of the atrocities which took place during World War II. In terms of realism it far surpasses Schindler's List, to the extent that it's quite frankly hard to sit through."

Dennis: "We did two movies over the past two years, A Death in the Family (2001) and Collected Stories (2002) on PBS by Pulitzer winning playwright Donald Margulies. It was a two-woman play that largely takes place in one room. It was like going back to TV's Golden Age."

DeanNYC writes on Imdb.com: "Linda Lavin is the mentor and Samantha Mathis is the student in this two person stage play adapted for the small screen. Mathis is nervously in awe of Lavin's author at the start, but as the piece moves on, we see both writers growing to care about each other over the years, Lavin seeing her pupil as the daughter she never had, and Mathis growing as a writer, soon to overshadow her teacher.

"Lavin confides in Mathis a story about a previous lover, a mentor she had, and the affair that they began in the 1950s. Mathis takes the tale and makes it her own, writing her first novel based on it. The questions of trusting someone as a family member and what is fair game to tell as "your story" serves as the heart of the film."

Dennis: "Then we did A Death in the Family, based on a classic Pulitzer-Prize winning piece of literature by James Agee."

Escaped writes on Imdb.com: "This fine production is a beautiful and faithful adaptation of the classic novel "A Death in the Family" about a 1915 Tennessee family with an almost idyllic life that is shaken with tragedy. In the lead role as Mary Follett, Annabeth Gish gives an amazing and touchingly real performance showing all the facets of this sensitive but strong woman who is a wife, mother, daughter, niece and sister to the other characters who are also excellently portrayed."

Luke: "Which of your projects most broke your heart?"

Dennis repeats my question to his assistant Peggy Griffin, who often gets an "associate producer" credit on his movies.

Neither of them can think of a disappointing project.

Dennis: "Everything I've done I've had pride in but Escape from Sobibor was as memorable as anything I'll ever be involved in. It was a big film canvas with extraordinary characters facing impossible odds of survival, and they did it."

Hanging With Marc W. On The Sunset Strip

Marc W. writes: Excellent dinner with his Lukeness (he paid again--my depleting Canadian bank account will be forever grateful) followed by a tacky tourist stroll along the sunset strip--including the Hustler store (snore). Our brisk walk culminated with our mutual need to take a leak. LF suggested a driveway behind a dark office tower. Not five seconds after resolving to relieve himself in the bushes--myself being a bit cagier about the process--a motorcycle zoomed up with the building's security guard behind the wheel. He essentially figured he'd caught an unseemly transaction between two devout Jews who had left their Torah community in order to satisfy one another's carnal needs. "Are your pants pulled up?" Luke was brusquely asked, right after the rent-a-cop insisted he remain standing several feet away from the headlight. When it was discovered that we were simply a couple of young men unable to find a urinal, he asked, "how would you like it if someone took a piss in your backyard?" Having seen the hovel, I don't think Luke would really care all *that* much ...

Rob writes: Marc, please accept my sincere apologies for this rent-a-cop's blatant act of anti-semtism ! I pray that the rest of your trip is not marred by any other hostile Jew-haters. Please feel free to piss where ever you wish on the rest of your American journey. Shalom.

PS Was Luke wearing his prayer shawl, yarmulke and clod hoppers during this hate crime?

Chaim Amalek writes: Did either of you sneak-a-peak?

Khunrum writes: Do you think "let's duck back here for a quick pee" is going to replace Luke's old standard line "You wanna see my gun"?...And isn't it suspicious that the alley Luke led Young Marc into just happened to be cornhole junction?

The beautiful Gentile scribe Moxie at www.moxie.nu writes: This evening the legendary Luke Ford arrived at my house to pick up tha Weis but was afraid of succumbing to the "shiksappeal" and refused to step inside while waiting for Marc to complete his evening reading of the Torah.

A few hours later, Marc rings the doorbell and tells a Moxiesque tale of almost getting arrested for "not having his pants on" behind an office building on the illustrious Sunset Strip.

Needless to say I was more than interested in missing some of the movie to hear his tale. Seems that after dinner the guys were viewing the sites on the illustrious Sunset Strip when nature called. Not being dressed appropriately to enter a club, nor willing to pay a 20 dollar cover charge to take a leak, they decided to let nature take its course behind a quiet deserted office building when a security guard on a motorcycle arrived. Strongly believing he was stopping an act of sodomy in the making, he shined his flashlight on them only to realize they weren't even standing close enough to hear each other speak.

Ironically, just moments before Luke had pointed out the infamous garage where celebrities and anyone else who shits cash meets the dealer who provides them with overpriced cocaine. These security guys have a blind eye for drugs, but God forbid two straight guys try to {extreme sarcasm} have a little homosexual love behind HIS office building.{extreme sarcasm} Because that sodomy stuff never happens in West Hollywood.